Mayo is the literal worst.

The scourge of the condiment world.

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Have I covered how much I hate mayo? It really, truly irks me and I wish it would go away.

Even homemade mayo, you ask? Yes. In culinary school, our first test was to make mayo from scratch. I whisked the egg yolks and the oil (two things I love!) until they were fluffy and creamy. I seasoned the mixture with some salt. And I could not bring myself to taste it for the final seasoning because my hand would not lift my spoon to my mouth. The disdain runs that deep.

This extends to aioli, too. And anything that ends in “salad.” Egg salad. Pasta salad. Potato salad. Tuna salad.

I just don’t know what mayo accomplishes that a good vinaigrette or ketchup can’t. Give me a pasta salad packed with veggies and tossed with lemon vinaigrette or crunchy coleslaw with a soy a…